Saturday, July 29, 2006

Blight of the Star Crossed Lovers and Hopeless Romantics

Each day I am delicately brainwashed by the ideals of silver screen love. I smile at Patrick Swayze's easy moves. Cary Grant, Clark Gable, and Romeo seduce my eye with the satisfaction of a role well fulfilled. Again I have cried at the frightful sight of a ghastly pale Gilbert Blythe emaciated from scarlet fever. And yes, I do always clutch my heart in agony as lovers part.
Diamond sunbursts and marble halls... Hmph.
This unrealistic euphoria is the archetype for almost all books, music, movies, and the media in general. Our society has glitter in its eyes and a soundtrack in its ears. Thus it is blind and deaf to the horrifying, gut-wrenching truth: this could never happen in real life.
Preschool was truly the closest I've ever been to these emotions. It was a simplistic love in its most innocent form. He tried to kiss me at recess, and after that I never spoke to him again.
To quote my beloved Lord Byron:
"Alas! the love of women! it is known
To be a lovely and fearful thing!"
Romance, true romance, unlike the kind they spoon feed you in the movie theater, is an unobtainable concept that has been doing irreparable harm to our psyches for as long as we can remember.
It’s not just the fantasy we’re going after…it’s what we think the fantasy leads to, which is the cause of the problem. It’s that feeling- that chemical imbalance- with the magic, the butterflies in your stomach, and the random acts of sappiness. It wraps around the 10 percent of our tiny brains that we actually use until we are incapable of intelligent thought or rationale. The phrase “Fools in love” truly has meaning.
Wednesday night is girl's night; a feminine evening spent in the company of friends procuring pedicures and gossip. But what does it lack? Ah, yes. The chick flick; which was devised as a means to satisfy the desperate craving for romance in a girl and instead leaves her empty handed and half crazed. This is the stereotypical activity that all women must enjoy, and every Wednesday I am forced to balk at my own misfortunes and seriously ponder my love life. Wait! It doesn't exist!
L-O-V-E, the four letter word that we have created for this psychosis, has been hyped up and cut down so many times as to quite leave me in the dark. The whole idea is extremely vexing. What am I to believe? From the pain I've observed in other people as they recover from falling in love, I am seriously considering a support group for those who have what we call 'The Happily Ever After' syndrome.
There is one thing that hopeless romantics everywhere should never neglect to remember: don't let the glitter blind you from all that crap lying around.
Move over Romanza. We're recovering from love and we will take no nonsense from you.

14 comments:

Nedge said...

Ditto! Ditto, big time! Yes, I'm sick of all the sappiness...someone needs to bring it down to the cold, hard facts.

Joslynn said...

How are we to get an impartial, honest opinion?
All the people I know, depending on where they fall in the love cycle, have very different opnions on the subject. After a break up: love is overrated and terrible. In a relationship: love is all they see and it is wonderful.
Indeed, it is a dilemma.

Anonymous said...

Once again you have covered an oh so important topic.....hmmmm Love. I have a confession to make I have often times found myself wrapped up in the romantic chic flicks. I have experienced the "Butterfly" feeling wishing that the actor would jump out of the screen and take me away on his big white horse. As a young girl I wanted to be Cinderella and have my prince just show up on my doorstep. I think the important issue here is that we realize that there never will be the perfect guy. Unfortunately in our oh so wonderfull Bingham High there is not a Gilbert Blythe, or for that matter anyone one who would even compare. So Joslynn I don't blame you for not having a love life. We both know I don't have one either. The important thing is that we don't wait around looking for our dearest Gilbert. Someday we will find (seperate) guys who may not be movie stars, but they will be special. *And mabey rich doctors too..... There may be some heartbreaks along the way, but that's what your friends are for.

Brittany said...

Love the post. Love your blog. Love the new pic. Love, love, love. Love is all you need.

Anonymous said...

"Once again you have covered an oh so important topic.....hmmmm Love."


She covered the topic of romance. Big difference when compared to love. For love comes in many, various, ways.
Don't fret too much about finding the "perfect" person. In time you find someone that you will think is perfect and they will think the same about you. That's what matters.

Joslynn said...

Gunther. Gunther! Who are you, oh Gunther?

Anonymous said...

I know who gunther is... do you know who this is? eh eh eh

Joslynn said...

Yes. No one else would ever go by the name 'Ickles' besides... the shadow knows!

Unknown said...

ah, my dear Jossay, i see your point. me, being the closet romantic than i am, this speaks to me. almost seemingly specificly to me :-)
but no matter how many times i fall in love, only to be betrayed or just to have the other person change their mind, i will never regret, nor forsake love as terrible because of the pain it can cause. It is all worth it for the moments you have, no matter how brief, knowing that to one person, you are everything.

Joslynn said...

Every person who has read this post has misinterpreted it.
It should have never been written.

Brittany said...

If it makes you feel better, I never read this post. I started to, realized I wouldn't get it, so then I just skipped to the comments part. For all I know, my previous comment could be completely irrelevant. But love was the word that I picked out of the skimming that's usually not there.

Joslynn said...

Well, that just makes me feel great, Brittanica.

Brittany said...

I didn't read it to not read it, I just didn't do it. Still haven't actually. I'll let you know if I ever do.

Brittany said...

Hey guess what! I just read this post for the first time all the way through. It was a good one, too. A bit bitter, but fun at the same time I suppose. Way to be. I'm glad you have so many posts. It's keeping me entertained during Calculus.